DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
