i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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