Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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