some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
