I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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