I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Randomize
