Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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