let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
