...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
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