Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
