you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
