found the other keg... it's in the tree
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Randomize
