they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i think i have two assholes
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize
