addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize
