OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
the day after is always just damage control
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
