so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
