So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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