He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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