you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
and you fell through a lawn chair
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
