he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize