it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Randomize
