Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
