Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
where am i from again
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
