The maid of honor just puked.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize