I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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