Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
