doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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