Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
