I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
two words: eviction party
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
third nipple confirmed
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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