i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
