But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
