Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
