She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
