I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Randomize
