She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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