I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
