:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Randomize
