I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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