id be glad to
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
