so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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