I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
