My balls are so social today.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Is it because I queefed?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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