Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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