If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
pray to the hookup gods
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
