the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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