Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
