he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
