she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
