Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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