But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
